Friday, May 20, 2011

I fought nature and I WON!

Last week during my tempo run I fell on a wet bridge. This week I chose another bridge (lol) because it was long and FLAT as hell:
site of deer encounter

So I did my usual 2 mile warm up. Right at mile 2 I was going over this bridge and see a brown, large animal running directly at me. Um, shit! My contacts have their usual layer of filth on them so all I can see is this large brown animal.
ok, no

 I stopped. Said verbatim, "fuck no" and hauled ass the other way. I figured no sense in looking back. If I was going to be Bambi's breakfast I just wanted it to be over quickly.

So I continue another half a mile to the park rangers office. I wish I had not just hit stop on my garmin because I ran psychotically fast. So I get there and I tried to compose myself. I knocked on the window inside and a nice lady park ranger answered:

Me: Uh hi, good morning. I am kinda freaked out. A large brown animal just chased me off the dam.

Ranger: That was probably a deer. We've had deer, water moccasins and snapping turtles ON the bridge every day this week.

Me: No way! I came here to get away from nature. Are you sure it couldn't be a bobcat? It chased me!

Ranger: No bobcat sightings recently. This may be the "friendly" deer a few people have reported. It likes to come up close to people. 

Me: oh great. I have to start my tempo run now. I just warmed up. I am going to run that bridge 10x very fast. Will it eat me?

Ranger: It shouldn't eat you but it's best not to provoke them. I'll be right out with you to do a patrol.

So I head out feeling better that Bambi would leave me alone. I turn the corner back onto the bridge and there the bastard is again. Standing there. I'm thinking, "NO, this is my tempo run. I've got enough adrenaline to kick it's fucking ass. I'm going for it. I haul ass and it's not moving or afraid at all. Suddenly every Discovery show on deer attacking humans is vivid in my mind.  Don't look, don't look, don't look.....I get by Bambi assault free. 6:21 pace for that first mile. Should have been 6:40. I was trying to not kill the first mile while simultaneously saving my life. I would rather go out with a proper split.

So now I get to the dead end and have to go back. I see the ranger and gave her a thumbs up.  But there  it was again but this time on the grass. I did a little back and forth jog to try and scare it...thankfully it went into the forest. but screwed up my split 6:50. Now I'm super pissed.  I can take a lot. I can run on a fractured leg, handle a root canal without pain meds, see my child bust open her chin on a stone walkway, BUT don't mess with my splits!! I can't deal. 

I haul ass for the next mile..I'm hauling and hauling so proud for not giving up and I look down in anticipation of my glorious split and my GARMIN is OFF. Mother #$%^&*! I can't handle this! So I took defeat for a second. I turned it back on and kept going.  The remaining miles were: 6:40, 6:48 and 6:26.

I so badly wanted 6 6:40's. Oh well, I survived. Still a good tempo. The 5 documented miles avg'd 6:37. I did a 2 mile cool down and called it a morning....yesterday I ran 10 miles easy at 7:17 pace so I was happy to still have some legs this morning. 

Another easy run tomorrow. And 15 Sunday. My final message to nature:

Cheers loves!


  1. don't you wish you had a camera with you to get a picture of Bambi!! That 1st one was a little quick and must have taken a little out of your legs...

  2. I need technology to catch up with me. I would love a teeny clip on camera that I could use for special occasions like this!

  3. I run every summer with the deer on Fripp Island South Carolina. The deer that are accustomed to humans will pretty much leave you alone. Unless you hear them snorting and kicking their feet on your approach. Take a picture next time!!! You need one of those helmet cams ;-)